It’s early morning, and as I sit outside watching Avery’s cardinal fly around Avery’s Garden with his girlfriend, I am reminded of how close my baby still is to me. The grey skies are starting to clear while the gentle mist of morning rain touches the Earth around me.
In this moment, there are so many sounds, smells and beauty to take in. The light trickles of water hitting the nearby flowers and leaves synchronize with the songs of the birds perched on the rooftops. The flowers in Avery’s Garden gently swaying in the morning breeze dancing in the landscape designed in honor of my son.
I take a stroll around the garden to see what new blooms have started to show. The intricate details of each flower so special and representing very specific meanings to my journey.
Avery’s Birthday is a day that welcomes so many emotions and feelings. I am heavy hearted, and there is despair, but I am also filled with love for my child. That is helping open the light within for the joyous parts to shine through. At 3:37 a.m. on this day last year, Avery made me a Mother. His physical life ended but in return I gained an angel that has been my beacon through the journey in life after loss. Avery has given me courage to speak out and tell the stories of pain and grief but also light and hope. His life has given me purpose, to join arms with families that know pain in child loss and to use my artistic gifts to remember other angel babies. Avery has set my soul on fire to be passionate and to embrace nature. I see things differently, as if a vail was lifted, and underneath was a world of wonder and beauty I had never seen before. He changed my life, forever.
Avery is remembered for the 20 weeks and 4 days he spent living inside my body. He brought me a kind of happiness I never thought possible when I was pregnant. I continue to look at my son and realize each time I see him how much he looks like my husband. A beautifully perfect replica of the man I will spend my life loving on Earth and the baby boy I will love from a distance.
Today, in honor of Avery’s birthday, Volume II: With Wings They Fly in the Avery’s Garden Coloring Book Series has been published. It was published at exactly 3:37 a.m. to celebrate the moment my baby bloomed into an angel.